de tanto bater o meu coração parou

Sometimes I turn around and catch the smell of you and I cannot go on I cannot fucking go on without expressing this terrible so fucking awful physical aching fucking longing I have for you. And I cannot believe that I can feel this for you and you feel nothing. Do you feel nothing?

(Silence.)

Do you feel nothing?

(Silence.)

And I go out at six in the morning and start my search for you. If I've dreamt a message of a street or a pub or a station I go there. And I wait for you.

(Silence.)

You know, I really feel like I'm being manipulated.

(Silence.)

I've never in my life had a problem giving another person what they want. But no one's ever been able to do that for me. No one touches me, no one gets near me. But now you've touched me somewhere so fucking deep I can't believe and I can't be that for you. Because I can't find you.

(Silence.)

Do you think it's possible for a person to be born in the wrong body?

(Silence.)

Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you for rejecting me by never being there, fuck you for making me feel shit about myself, fuck you for bleeding the fucking love and life out of me, fuck my father for fucking up my life for good and fuck my mother for not leaving him, but most of all, fuck you God for making me love a person who does not exist,
FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU.

Sarah Kane, 4.48 Psychosis (aqui)

we've all been there

We've All Been There, Nicholas Clifford, 2013

34 excuses for why we failed at love

1. I’m lonely so I do lonely things.

2. Loving you was like going to war, I never came back the same.

3. You hate women, just like your father and his father, so it runs in your blood.

4. I was wandering the derelict car park of your heart looking for a ride home.

5. You’re a ghost town I’m too patriotic to leave.

6. I stay because you’re the beginning of the dream I want to remember.

7. I didn’t call him back because he likes his girls voiceless.

8. It’s not that he’s wants to be a liar, it’s just that he doesn’t know the truth.

9. I couldn’t love you, you were a small war.

10. We covered the smell of loss with jokes.

11. I didn’t want to fail at love like our parents.

12. You made the nomad in me build a house and stay.

13. I’m not a dog.

14. We were trying to prove our blood wrong.

15. I was still lonely so I did even lonelier things.

16. Yes, I’m insecure, but so was my mother and her mother.

17. No, he loves me he just makes me cry a lot.

18. He knows all of my secrets and still wants to kiss me.

19. You were too cruel to love for a long time.

20. It just didn’t work out.

21. My dad walked out one afternoon and never came back.

22. I can’t sleep because I can still taste him in my mouth.

23. I cut him out at the root , he was my favourite tree, rotting, threatening the foundations of my home.

24. The women in my family die waiting.

25. Because I didn’t want to die waiting for you.

26. I had to leave, I felt lonely when he held me.

27. You’re the song I rewind until I know all the words and I feel sick.

28. He sent me a text that said ‘I love you so bad’

29. His heart wasn’t as beautiful as his smile.

30. We emotionally manipulated one another until we thought it was love.

31. Forgive me, I was lonely so I chose you.

32. I’m a lover without a lover

33. I’m lovely and lonely.

34. I belong deeply to myself.

Warsan Shire

chorando baixinho

Time is a matter of fact / And it's gone and it'll never come back / And mine, it's wasted all the time / Tears, stupid tears, bring me down

Daniel Johnston, Tears Stupid Tears

the beautiful people

Myth #1 – Introverts don’t like to talk.
This is not true. Introverts just don’t talk unless they have something to say. They hate small talk. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won’t shut up for days.

Myth #2 – Introverts are shy.
Shyness has nothing to do with being an Introvert. Introverts are not necessarily afraid of people. What they need is a reason to interact. They don’t interact for the sake of interacting. If you want to talk to an Introvert, just start talking. Don’t worry about being polite.

Myth #3 – Introverts are rude.
Introverts often don’t see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest. Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so Introverts can feel a lot of pressure to fit in, which they find exhausting.

Myth #4 – Introverts don’t like people.
On the contrary, Introverts intensely value the few friends they have. They can count their close friends on one hand. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you’re in.

Myth #5 – Introverts don’t like to go out in public.
Nonsense. Introverts just don’t like to go out in public FOR AS LONG. They also like to avoid the complications that are involved in public activities. They take in data and experiences very quickly, and as a result, don’t need to be there for long to “get it.” They’re ready to go home, recharge, and process it all. In fact, recharging is absolutely crucial for Introverts.

Myth #6 – Introverts always want to be alone.
Introverts are perfectly comfortable with their own thoughts. They think a lot. They daydream. They like to have problems to work on, puzzles to solve. But they can also get incredibly lonely if they don’t have anyone to share their discoveries with. They crave an authentic and sincere connection with ONE PERSON at a time.

Myth #7 – Introverts are weird.
Introverts are often individualists. They don’t follow the crowd. They’d prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don’t make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy.

Myth #8 – Introverts are aloof nerds.
Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to their thoughts and emotions. It’s not that they are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around them, it’s just that their inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to them.

Myth #9 – Introverts don’t know how to relax and have fun.
Introverts typically relax at home or in nature, not in busy public places. Introverts are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. If there is too much talking and noise going on, they shut down. Their brains are too sensitive to the neurotransmitter called Dopamine. Introverts and Extroverts have different dominant neuro-pathways. Just look it up.

Myth #10 – Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.
A world without Introverts would be a world with few scientists, musicians, artists, poets, filmmakers, doctors, mathematicians, writers, and philosophers. That being said, there are still plenty of techniques an Extrovert can learn in order to interact with Introverts. (Yes, I reversed these two terms on purpose to show you how biased our society is.) Introverts cannot “fix themselves” and deserve respect for their natural temperament and contributions to the human race. In fact, one study (Silverman, 1986) showed that the percentage of Introverts increases with IQ.